Popular Pastor lynched by church mob for preaching that Santa isn’t real

Posted: December 14, 2013 in Christianity, News, Satire
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BRIXTON -The  popular pastor preached a message that didn’t go down well with his congregation. The man of God had just started his sermon when he asked the congregation to find time during the festive season of Christmas to focus on the birth of Christ and for once not give in so much to commercialism and myths like Father Christmas or Santa. At this point there was an instantaneous riot. The pastor was taken down and placed in a head lock by a deacon as ushers and congregants tore up his sermon notes. The service ended early – needless to say the lucky shirtless clergy man sneaked out under the pews and swiftly disappeared down the road in a rented cab.

“Doesn’t he know what Christmas is all about? We want him to preach to us what we want to hear and today he has let us down! If we lose Santa then there is no Christmas!” lamented a deacon.

“He has just ruined our Christmas,” said a distressed parent of a Sunday school toddler. “My child is inconsolable and his self esteem has taken a nose dive.”

The pastor who is now in hiding has not been seen since the half sermon. His Facebook page has been taken down and the curtains in his home were still drawn by this afternoon four days later. When The Floating Axehead attends church again this Sunday we will be able to update you as to what the progress is in this bizarre modern tale.


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